Lea Simpson is strategy director at TH_NK
Apart from a couple of ooh ahh moments, CES 2014’s exhibitors felt mostly like expensively decorated floats at a massive mediocrity parade. Harsh? Let me explain.
The good stuff felt incremental. The bad felt like gadgets nobody would ever want. And the ugly embodied the darker parts of digital culture.
Let’s start with the oohs and aahs.
Cars people, yes, cars. Call me crazy, but when I spend tens of thousands of pounds on something I don’t really put it in the same category as my sound system or mobile phone. So imagine my surprise when coverage of cars at CES got me sitting up straight for the first time ever.
I’m going to ignore grim car contributions like Tesla’s solar fan monstrosity that looked like it’s running late for Ascot. Instead, let’s pay our dues to solar powered cars from Ford, the car-motorbike lovechild from Toyota and my personal favourite the connected cars, from, well everyone. As part of the Knight Rider generation, I have my ticket to the ball and I’ve never been more ready for a robot-car-friend.
Oculus Rift was another posterchild for goodness this year. Watching people demo their virtual reality headset is like watching two girls one cup, inverted. Their reaction is just as visceral, but filled with childlike glee and more-wanting.
Finally, I reckon the one clear winner of CES was (drumroll please) Sony. Top of the list for me is Playstation Now, the console in the cloud. They’ve nailed the three killer elements that spell the future of digital distribution 1. Access over ownership 2. Cloud-based overlocal 3. Device neutral over walled garden. Yes, yes, I know that would win a game of bullshit bingo, but truth is, it will also win the digital games race – these guys left CES with a significant first mover advantage.
Other cool things from Sony include its UltraShort Throw Projector. The gadget sits directly in front of a wall and throws up an enormous image (147 inches) all in crystal clear 4k. But before you get too excited, you might also want to know its eye-watering pricetag sits north of $40,000.
Luckily, another good thing to come out of CES is that things are getting much cheaper, so, if it’s anything like the MakerBot it will be utterly affordable in around 2018.
So, that’s the glass half full.
The vast majority of CES 2014 felt miserably mediocre. Sitting alongside the same old, same old, bigger, bendier screens were countless launches that instantly got tagged ‘just because you can, doesn’t mean you should’ from a never-ending stream of startups with more funding than flair.
Some best ‘worsts’ from around the web include the projector with a built in hotspot, a million clunky types of wearable tech that let you quantify the bejesus out of yourself (and your dog). The internet of things attached to everything, for the most high maintenance life/home/car/office ever. Redundant accessory keyboards for your phone and – speaking of accessories for your phone – did you know you can now get an iPhone attachment taser? Please form an orderly queue.
The lack of real innovation is a real shame, but the biggest shame of all was that the display of the darkest parts of digital culture. First up, Michael Bay. Even my mother knows the guy had a meltdown on the first day of CES. News of his fumble went everywhere and took its tone of schadenfreude with it. For me the onslaught of mockery around what was clearly a painful, public, panic attack epitomized trolling culture.
Also filed under societal flaws are the booth babes. It’s a crazy shame that such a role still exists in the year 2014 and from what I can tell, the only moves made to address this awkward sexism is to stick a bunch of male babes in booths too. Inhale. And exhale. I can’t help but feel it embodies the old-fashionedness of CES overall.
The bottom line is that if you want to be at the forefront of tech, you won’t want to be there, plain and true. CES 2014 was incremental and tired, saved only by a small selection of decent ideas. Apple and Microsoft are conspicuous in their absence (again) and it seems to be getting worse year on year. At the end I was left asking one question: CES, why so irrelevant all the time?